Meditating on Meditation

Tonight's meditation class --- which was actually a Flow & Meditation Class, so about 20 minutes of Meditation practice, after we "prepared the body" by working our Asanas off with 40 minutes of hip-opening flow --- ANYWAY, tonight's meditation class really helped quiet my mind. For at least 2 entire minutes. Seriously.

But as I make fun of myself, I am also patting myself on the back, because two minutes of being present in the moment, just breathing, thinking of nothing but the breath is tough. My internal struggle went a little bit like this...

SO... HUM.... (the mantra I use most often: So Hum, So on the inhale and Hum on the exhale, which means, "I Am That.")

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

I like my mantra. I am That. I am That. I am my breath. How cool is that. I am my breath. What are we, if not our breath?

Oh, I'm thinking about my mantra. I shouldn't be thinking about anything. Let me just put this thought aside.

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

I'm so hungry. Chicken soup from El Potro would really hit the spot tonight. Can I eat nothing but tortillas with queso and the soup broth? I bet the soup broth has a lot of good vitamins and protein from the chicken and veggies. Oh lord, why am I thinking about dinner when I should be emptying my mind. Let me put this thought aside.

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

Did everyone just hear my stomach growl? And who is breathing so loud? Do they know how loud they're breathing? How can they quiet their mind when they're breathing so loudly? I'm talking to myself again, aren't I.

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

I'll need to post this on the blog tonight, because meditation is HARD. It's supposed to be HARD. That's why we do it! If we can train our minds to be quiet... OH... Right, Quiet. Quiet.

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

SOOOOO... HUMMMMMM...

..... And you get the gist. Meditation takes PRACTICE and even just for the two minutes (in total) out of twenty that I did manage to quiet my constantly running script in my head, I could feel the benefits.

And I LOVE how our teacher ended our time together tonight. Jumin said: "How is your back? Sore? How do you feel? A little tired? It won't be that way forever. Nothing is permanent. The pain isn't permanent. The heaviness isn't permanent. You won't feel it forever. As we sit here, in our practice, we may feel it, but see? You did it. We're all still here. Namaste."